I'm starting to think that I'm a bit nutty. One minute: I'm like forget being complacent. The second minute: I'm like, well, I need to wait it out. Do I need to just grow the hell up & stop complaining about stuff? I am one of those people who tends to over think stuff sometimes. I always wonder that if some of my external factors change that I will be ok.
Mainly: I need money. My friend Mia always has this thought that I cant help but sometimes agree with. Getting a big house on a piece of land and growing your own food & just chilling back & living. I wouldn't mind escaping the city for those kind of dreams. The city is taking all my money & making me create new ways to enslave myself.
1. I need to gas to get to my job every week. (I am employed by three companies.)
2. The government says I need a new T.V. (which is making me question whether I even think having one is relevant)
3. Add all of the other stuff that rapes my pockets.
Then you have my so-called life.
My girl asked me about my birthday plans. Yesterday I had some. Today I'm like screw it.
Teavana called me for an interview. I'm gonna go. They're going to hire me. I already know it. I'm going to have to see what exactly it is that they are looking for. I would love to work there. It just might not be practical since I am trying to move. Once again for monetary reasons.
I almost see why some of my friends still stay at home. I wish I could do that. I could but my parents are a tad bit pushy. They are basically on the verge of retirement & they are not trying to have any birds coming back to the nest. Besides, I'm not even cut out for it. I need space. I need space. I need space.
Yesterday was like the never-ending shit story. It just wouldn't stop. I don't even want to talk about what happened to me yesterday on my way to work. Let's just say that I didn't make it there.
I obviously need to free up my chi. It has to be blocked. I am making it my business to find the root of the problem. Maybe I need to try yoga or something. I need a focus. Something to do once I leave 8-5.
Ill be back. I feel as if I'm rambling. Im starting to get scared. I need some anxiety medicine forreal. I feel an attack coming on.
1 comment:
I actually have considered one day living in the country on a farm, and working and growing everything myself. Farmers get so many tax breaks, and their usually pretty well off financially.
With the tv thingy. I really don't understand it. Isn't it just those old skool tvs, that majority are out of order and most folks have tv's sitting on top of them or an antenna?
The gas is killing me. I'm having a real cash drought right now because of it. Its 407 for regular now. I saw it this morning. If it reaches $5 a gallon. I am seriously going to buy a bike and ride 20miles to work.
At least I'll get a really good workout. lol
-Shanda(R)
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